Am I Being Too Picky?

I will admit that this whole realm of “motherdom” is new and exciting and terrifying and joyous….all at the same time.  I have constant questions and a variety of possible answers.  Reading, trying, revising, and trying again have become my new routine with my precious babe.  Part of that involves some of you brilliant bloggers who have helped me with possible solutions to my latest conundrums or offered assurance that I am not alone.

Here’s my question.  When it comes to parental requests in a daycare setting, what things should you let slide?  Upon our first meeting, I was assured that my instructions would be followed and I felt very confident about the situation, albeit temporary as my permanent daycare provider recently had a baby.  Lately, I’ve noticed little things that, I’ll admit, irk me and I don’t know if it’s a battle worth fighting or not.

What are the irksome things you ask?  Well for starters, she is not using the bottles I’ve sent for her to use.  I often get him home to find him in a different diaper than the brand I provide, and I found a different pacifier in the bassinet with him today when I picked him up, while his was sitting on the counter.  Another this, but one that I don’t feel is a huge issure, is the fact that he is pretty filthy each day when I pick him up.  I know that babies spit up, poop (in case you’ve forgotten), drool, and learn cool habits like buzzing their lips while you’re trying to feed them peas.  But to still have a crusty nose or carrots and cereal on his face 8 or 9 hours later seems weird.  If I know that we’re going anywhere immediately after I pick him up, I dress him in “comfy cozies” and plan to put him in his “spiffy” clothes when I pick him up. 

Are any of these things, concerns that you would bring up with your provider?  I think my hesitation with this is the fact that we’re only going to be with this provider for another 6-8 weeks and our permanent provider has a parenting style that more closely matches mine.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not questioning her ability to care for my child, or questioning that his needs (physical, mental, emotional and so forth) are being met.  I think the underlying issue for me, is the constant question of what other requests are being ignored? 

I’ve got my own thoughts about this, but would love to hear from some of you.  To those of you who simply read, please come out of hiding and leave a comment!

4 thoughts on “Am I Being Too Picky?

  1. I had the same feelings when I felt the day care wasn’t clean enough…food on the floor, dishes piled high, etc etc. I felt I was being too picky and a friend told me to follow my instinct, C. was my #1 priority and if I didn’t look out for him who would? No he wasn’t in immediate danger, but I wasn’t comfortable leaving him there. We found someone else that I love…although C. always comes home with a dirty face, but I let that go.

    I would definetly say something…maybe say that you’ve noticed other kid’s diapers on C. and somone elses pacifier in his mouth and suggest you label everything with C’s name so she knows what’s his. That way no one is offended, but will hopefully get the hint!!


  2. I know we have to pick our battles in life, and while thase are not major issues, I would also be uncomfortable with it. For me it would be mostly knowing that my child was having someone elses pacifier in there mouth. I am a germ nut, and with all the bacterias that build up in those things and all the new staph infections that are suddenly appearing, I would deffinatly ask why that was not a concern of hers. And maybe send an extra paci(marked as pp mentioned), so maybe if the other one is lost, dirty…so there is no excuse for using someone elses.
    With the diaper issue, Maybe ask if SHE think there is something wrong with the fit of the diapers your sending for your child??? My point is, this is your little man, she is getting paid to watch. She might just need a friendly reminder on what Garth and you prefer for your child.
    Go with how the two of you feel and follow your instincts, you both should be able to go through your day knowing that big or small little Calder needs are being met.


  3. I agree with all of the above. He’s your little man! Your daycare should do exactly what it is that you want them to do. I do not know your relationship with your provider, but you may need to work on how to “break it to her”. Subtle hints do the best at first, but if you’re not seeing improvement, then maybe you’ll need to be more direct. Or, maybe like you said 6-8 weeks then on to the next watcher. Is it really worth it?

  4. I know we have had issues about all that you have mentioned. Ok maybe not the pacifier but everything else. For the past two years, I have been the one to pick up our girls for the most part. I have noticed things that I didn’t care for. For instance, our provider wakes Ella up before she is ready to get up because she wanted her on a “schedule” to help us out. I finally had to say something when everyday she came home and was a real crab.

    I am not real good at telling our daycare provider what we want. I know it’s hard to believe. I usually don’t have a problem telling anyone anything.

    But, if you truly aren’t happy, I would mention something to her. She may not realize that it is upsetting you. If you say something and it continues, then look on. We moved on after a year with Alexis and she turned out ok.

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